Today, I just feel that my parent want me to return what they've given for me. I don't know. But, what I know is parent's love is very sincere. They care because of their love. But I'm wrong. I can see it quite clear. :( I'm actually a type of person who can't let the others care while I don't. I always try to return their kindness as possible as I can. But unfortunately, I can't do it now. I'm powerless. I have nothing to give. :(
I haven't been begging something over to them. I don't want bothering them. I've been trying to handle every problem by myself. Without their helps. It's hard, though. But It's my choice beside they want me to. Ya Allah, please give me your help to return what they've given to me. I mean, give me power to make them happy. I want make them happy after growing me up. They've given so much for me but I still can't make them happy. I'm so sad to be useless like this. I want to be independent.
I'm suffering to be like this. Being useless and blamed all the time. I know that it'll be your one of the best lesson for me. Thank you. I hope I can pass it well. And take the thing you want me to know. Thanks. :)
That's all. Starting by crying but ending by smiling. I wrote this when I was crying.
